The Trump goes Nixonian and Virginia becomes the die before vote state...must be Wednesday!5/18/2016
![]() Success! On a Wednesday, no less! Cousin Fred and I have landed our next big assignment, though there are a number of strings attached. Hate strings. Southern Living Magazine has offered us the opportunity to cover the California primary. It’s shaping up to be a blood bath…literally. But, the strings attached include having one of their reps on site to approve whatever expenses we expend. Kind of takes the fun out of it, but I’m certain we can corrupt the rep to our way of thinking in no time…you’ll see. The California Orgy won’t happen until June 7, so it gives Cousin Fred and me the opportunity to assemble some protective combat gear, you know, like any other embedded journalists would normally wear in places like Kandahar, Kunduz, or 2300 North Lincoln Blvd. Actually, I told Cousin Fred that we have to play this one straight. If we do, I’m certain we’ll get sent to cover the GOP fiasco in Cleveland and the Democratic melee in Philadelphia. The past 24 hours have been fascinating to watch. The Queen of the Unindicted won in Kentucky, which she all but HAD to do. Not that there was any real chance of The Curmudgeon catching up to her delegate-wise, but it would have looked unseemly to go into California with a string of May losses. The Curmudgeon took Oregon. No surprise there…that state has Sir Bernie written all over it. Still, and again, it doesn’t give The Curmudgeon enough delegates to do much damage at this point, but a win’s a win and it points to fracturing in the party. But, we’re beginning to see new tactics emerge. For instance, it almost passed without anyone noticing, but new details are being revealed that show that the Nevada Democratic State Convention this past weekend may be a sign of things to come. Well, before I dive into that, let me just point out that the Democratic Party has long been the party of if it feels good, do it. When I think of a Democratic state convention, I think of people lounging lazily in chairs as they engage in spirited discussions about whether there’s still time enough to get a measure to decriminalize marijuana on the November ballot in their state. And, of course, there isn’t time…it’s a very Democrat thing to procrastinate until it’s too late, but there’s always next time. So, there was no one more surprised at the chaotic near-riot that the Nevada State Convention became. And, get this! The sort-of revolt was led by The Curmudgeon’s followers! Who could have seen that coming? The very man who daily manages to look like an unmade bed and/or a second year college student’s couch…doesn’t fit a Che Guevara image, does it? Perhaps The Curmudgeon is more of a fighter than I originally gave him credit. It seems that there were charges of the Nevada convention being “rigged” and “fixed” for the Queen of the Unindicted. Going into the convention, it appeared that The Curmudgeon had the most delegates lined up, but when it got to the end, several of his delegates had been disqualified and Her Majesty appeared headed to the Philadelphia National Convention with the most delegates from Nevada. People were throwing chairs around and shouts of a corrupt convention were heard. The police were called. Feelings were hurt. It’s about as unruly as Democrats can manage honestly. Now, the Nevada Democratic State Chair is receiving death threats and having her phone number and email address posted on line. Those are tactics worthy of Republican troublemakers - they have a long history of doing crap like this…goes back to Nixon…he is dead, isn’t he? Finally, The Curmudgeon had to emerge from the shadows and denounce the violence – chairs and shouts of a corrupt convention count as violence in the Democratic Party. I seriously can’t help but wonder if this isn’t some sort of plot by The Trump’s henchmen to throw the Dems into utter chaos before their national convention. Very Nixonian. He is dead, right? The Trump is on cruise control to his national convention, he all but owns the Republican Party now. Unless he does something really stupid like drop trou on national TV to show Megyn Kelly what kind of man he really is – it’s a done deal. In fact it’s been so quiet from Republican side that The Trump is making an effort to tweet and re-tweet veiled threats at Her Majesty that keep him sort-of on the fringe of the news. On Tuesday, CNN’s breaking news was that Trump had filed a new financial disclosure that said he made $560 million last year. I guess that’s a compromise for not allowing your tax return to be released. I’m telling you people, this presidential cycle is unprecedented in its rancor, mischief, and plain old bullsh*t. But, rest assured that Cousin Fred and I will be there, every step of the way to stay up with the body count. And, speaking of body counts, there was a 68 year old woman from Virginia who died a few days ago. Her obituary read (and I swear I’m not making this up), “Faced with the prospect of voting for either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton, Mary Anne Noland of Richmond chose, instead, to pass into the eternal love of God on Sunday.” Yep, it’s all long haul to November, people. Check your seatbelts and raise your seat tray to the locked position. There’s turbulence up ahead. Comments are closed.
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