 Happy friggin’ Monday, everybody! Just in case you didn’t think things could possibly get any weirder, they have. In fact, it’s a lot weirder. No, I’m not talking about things here at The Compound where new never-previously-imagined levels of weirdness abound daily. I mean, there’s the Wife who seems perfectly content sitting atop the roof of the main house here puffing filterless Pall Malls and swigging from bottles of Old Crow while singing “My Philadelphia Home.” There’s re-replication of the Cabinet Saloon going back up on the north lawn. Spoiler alert – it will likely burn to the ground again. Cousin Fred and the hairdressing hydrologist Gigi (The Trump’s former hairdresser) hole up in a love nest below ground known as Das Boot (plug it into a German translator). See what I mean? Sometimes it feels as though I’m the only normal one around here. Especially after The Trump went on another of his Twitter diatribes this weekend, doubling down on the media as the “enemy of the people”, etc. Okay, actually that’s not so weird, that’s really become the norm. I know, sad isn’t it? You can’t deny though that weirdness is flying at us from all angles, much of it we try to present here in CCB. But then, it came. Perhaps the pinnacle of weirdness. It arrived Saturday from Russia (with love?). An announcement by the Russian government that Steven Seagal (remember him, Mr. Personality?) was being made a special envoy with the goal of facilitating humanitarian ties between the U.S. and Russia. Huh? Well, the Russians have already proven they’re good at facilitating hacking and nearly destroying the foundation of American democracy with their election meddling. So why not? Seriously, use a has-been movie actor to help us all learn to get along better. Sorry, I just threw up a little in my mouth. I can’t make up weirdness like this…I only wish I could! So, the statement from the Russian Foreign Ministry reads that Mr. Personality’s unpaid position would be to “facilitate relations between Russia and the United States in the humanitarian field, including cooperation in culture, arts, public and youth exchanges.” Whatever the hell all that will entail! Turns out, Seagal became a Russian citizen in 2016. Who knew? He has been a very vocal supporter of Vlad “The Poot” Putin and his policies including the 2014 invasion (aka, annexation) of Crimea. He has also been a very loud critic of the U.S. since moving to Russia. What the hell is going on? Curiously, his movies are still very popular with Russian audiences, so I guess you go where you get press? Weird, weirder, weirdest. Wonder if Mr. Personality and The Poot meet to duke it out in martial arts fights? I might actually pay money to see that kind of action. I’m going to throw this out there for the record. So, years ago, back in the mid-90s I think, I was working on the Joint Staff in the Pentagon (known in DoD circles as Jerusalem on the Potomac). The guy I was working for at the time, a Navy four-star, in the span of a couple of weeks, brought a couple of (we thought at the time) heavy-hitters into the E-ring for a few hours of schmooze and lunch in the Chairman’s Dining Room. The first was Donald Trump, who at the time was trailing Marla Maples with him. I can tell you from meeting the couple that she was definitely a step above him. He came across then (as he does now) as a vacuous narcissist. Ms. Maples, on the other hand, seemed a very classy, very bright person. All of us who met him were puzzled as to what she was doing with him. Apparently, she was puzzled herself, she soon dumped him…or he dumped her…I can’t remember. Next, we hosted Steven Seagal. Admittedly, I was never a fan of his movies. I remember a BIG dude. He was wearing a leather jacket with beautiful hand bead work descending down the front from both shoulders. He wore it in one of his movies, something based in Alaska where he saves the world from bad guys (a common theme in his flicks). I do recall he didn’t seem particularly bright, but most Hollywood actor-types aren’t so you just accept that as fact. The thing that really struck me was when you looked at the back of that jacket there was a HUGE stain across the collar and down a little bit onto the jacket itself. At that point, those of us who had met him wondered if he ever showered or if he simply lived in that jacket. Yeesh. As I’m thinking back on all of that, I’m wondering if it’s a mere coincidence that both of those individuals stepped into my view in so short a period of time, only to reappear now. Years of doing the work that I did have taught me that there is NO SUCH THING as coincidence. That I firmly believe. We’re doomed. That is all! Comments are closed.
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