![]() My name is Robin and Conrad Hilton spits in my coffee. Today’s post falls into the category of no good deed goes unpunished. So, the Wife and I left The Compound for a few days to attend a wedding just outside of Denver. We decided to drive, which from The Compound is an 8-hour adventure, but I like long drives. After 8 hours in the vehicle and some truly marginal smoked BBQ along I-25, we arrive. I drop the Wife at the front door of the place and park. I come inside to find that we have no reservation. We’re supposed to be there for three nights, but they have nothing. And, there are no more rooms available. I should point out that we probably contributed to the confusion at check-in because we wound up making two reservations for that weekend…honestly, I don’t remember why. Actually, it was the Wife who made the reservations, I had nothing to do with it. That’s a key point here as you’ll see in just a second. The crime photo on the left (I’m the rather rotund fellow in the black t-shirt) shows me heading toward the lobby computer to pull up email and see if I can find a confirmation number. At that point, the person behind the counter couldn’t find ANY reservation and kept asking if we had a confirmation number. I had been on the road for 8 hours…all I wanted to do was lay down. Finally, she finds the reservation for that night and that night only. Curiously, and this is a friggin’ mystery. They find the reservation for the other two nights in MY NAME. I had nothing to do with making reservations. But, hey, we’re in so what do I care? Young woman at desk tells us that we’ll have to move rooms the next day for reasons that still make no sense to me other than they wanted to torture us…you’ll see what I mean in a second…for causing such a ripple in their staid, efficient lobby. The first room was great. Had been recently updated, it appears. The next morning (we had to be out of the room by 11AM) we stopped at the desk to get keys for the second room. That’s the crime scene photo on the right. We get moved into the “new” room on a lower floor. Much older room, not recently updated. The AC doesn’t seem to be working all that well. The curved shower rod sags so the stupid curtain doesn’t close properly. The toilet runs…blah blah blah. We were in a hurry so we dropped our stuff and headed out the door. After we’re back for a few days, I get an email from this hotel (turns out they’re part of the Hilton chain) asking me to fill out a brief survey of my stay. That brief survey took me like 30 minutes to complete, but hey I’m in. So I rated them overall a 7. I detailed the issues we encountered on checking in. Well, nearly a week passes and yesterday I receive an email from an assistant manager at the place. It’s lengthy and took her some time to write, but she addressed each and every of my complaints. Now, while that may be a mark of great customer service, frankly the tone of the thing was condescending (I know, because I am the emperor of condescending). She begins with an entirely too detailed rundown of our check-in experience to the point of quoting the Wife or I in dealing with the person at the desk. HINT: be careful what you say at the front desk of a Hilton Hotel, they’re recording your conversation. She even included the crime scene photos…why? Why would you do something like that? Did she think I would be pleased with receiving crime scene photos of myself when I hadn’t even bother to rob the place? Maybe she was sitting behind her desk thinking, “I’ll fix this a**hole troublemaker. I’ll include surveillance footage of him so he knows I can! Yeah, that’s it!” She pointed out that her desk clerk did nothing wrong and that it was our fault that the reservations were screwed up. I never took her desk clerk to task…my issue was with Hilton’s @!$king reservation system. She challenged my claim about the AC in the second room being bad. She sent someone to the room who reported that it was 68 degrees in there. Uh huh. Sister, you weren’t confined to that room all night with the AC blowing tepid air. She said there was no report made to the desk about the toilet. No I suppose not SINCE I DIDN’T MAKE ONE. She sent someone to look at the toilet who said it was fine. Uh huh. She did acknowledge that I was telling the truth about the shower rod. She was sorry for that and gave an extra 500 points to my Hilton Honors account. WTF? I DON’T HAVE A HILTON HONORS ACCOUNT! I didn’t ask for money back or anything else. You asked me to fill out a survey about our visit. This I did and you see what it gets me? The Spanish Inquisition, that’s what! Oh and crime scene photos suitable for framing or posting on a stupid blog. It just occurred to me. I’m headed to Lawton, OK this afternoon for an OMA board meeting (Oklahoma Museums Association). Guess where I’m staying? Go on, guess. Yep, Hilton freaking Garden in Lawton. I bet the Queen of Condescending has called ahead and instructed the staff there to spit into my coffee in the morning. Guess I’d better wear a disguise. I can’t wait to get a survey request from this stay! That is all! Comments are closed.
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