One more dead rocket scientist in North Korea...the IRS and OTC are made up of savage war criminals...brother, can you spare a half-off chocolate bunny...and who the heck is the guy in the photo? Hint, it's not Mr. Robin!

Friends, I hope you’re well this post-Easter Monday. Judging by the posts on Facebook, it appears that everyone had a fabulous day. Me? Why, thanks for asking.

I spent the day working on taxes and I can tell you it wasn’t pretty. I had big plans for making a run to the Cosmic City Walmart today to buy up the half-off chocolate bunnies, but instead I’ll be writing big checks to the IRS and Oklahoma Tax Commission.

Hey, wasn’t Trump going to do away with IRS? Eh, he’s too busy trying to dismantle healthcare and drop $16M MOAB’s on targets that really don’t have much impact (though it does leave a huge hole in the ground), oh, and then there’s the whole Russian thing.

I only got started on the taxes after I emerged from beneath the ground late Saturday night and discovered the Crazy North Koreans hadn’t started World War III…yet.

One thing I have learned over the past several days is that I can’t seem to make viable doomsday predictions. You may recall in the last CCB post that I was urging people to do idiotic things in anticipation of all of us being extinguished at the hands of that lunatic Kim Jong Uno (aka, he of weird haircut).

Well, it didn’t happen, of course. No death from above via Pyongyang. I know, I sound disappointed, huh?

The Crazy North Koreans allegedly tried to launch one of their new ICBM’s over the weekend, but it didn’t work. Reports claim that it exploded before it actually got off the ground. Somewhere in North Korea, a rocket scientist was heard screaming, “I told you it wasn’t ready to fly yet. But does anyone ever listen to me? Nooooooooo!” That was followed by a single gunshot.

The Crazy North Koreans have hinted that the U.S. sabotaged the launch via a cyber-attack. Really? Way to go U.S.A. Somewhere in America, an intelligence geek is saying, “We did? Oh right, we did! Yea team! Can we have more budget now please?” That was followed by a bum’s rush out the door.

The U.S. countered that Kim’s arsenal is more cardboard than actual whatever they actually use to make missiles.

In the meantime, The Trump has a Navy carrier battle group sitting off the coast of the Korean peninsula and he’s threatening to start bombing strategic targets in North Korea. All of this of course is making China really nervous.

And, in the middle of it all there are tons of photos of Mike Pence standing at the Korean DMZ and looking way more presidential than The Trump could ever possibly muster.

So, I guess there’s still potential for mass destruction somewhere.

I just realized that I’ve not seen Cousin Fred since I went into the storm cellar on Thursday in anticipation of total nuclear annihilation at the hands of Crazy North Koreans. He’s been hunkered down in the Cab. I thought maybe he was working on his taxes, but then I remembered that he never files. He doesn’t have income, he just mooches off whatever relative lets him stay.

Great work, if you can get it.

My guess would be that he’s down there plotting his next move with regard to the hairdressing hydrologist Gigi. If he is, I reckon we can expect more black helicopter raids this week.

It’s gonna be great…you’ll see.

That is all!
 

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