![]() Here we are, another stinkin’ Monday! Sunday was a busy one here in Cosmic City. Let’s see, it was Mother’s Day, of course. Then there was the high school graduation going on in self-cleaning-oven-temps. Yep, more than 1,000 hot, sweaty bodies packed into the stands of the football stadium to watch their kids take one step closer to the miserable hell that is adulthood. So glad I missed that yesterday. Besides being outdoors at the hottest time of the day, there was the whole parking thing. Cars filled the lot at the high school and then spilled out onto wherever anyone could find space. Word has it that the school district in the coming year is planning a new bondage issue for a multi-tiered parking garage (can’t spread out – go up) and air conditioning for the stadium. Yeah, that’ll fly. The cool thing (pardon the poorly constructed pun without any sort of contextual point) about the whole multi-level parking garage is that it could be a money maker for the district. Think about it, you could charge a premium for people to park on the east edge of the upper two levels. They would be high enough to see what’s going on in the stadium without having to get out of their vehicle. Just sit there with the AC and/or heat blowing and watch whatever. Genius! Genius, I’m telling you! Eh well, so if you’re a recent graduate of high school and you’re reading this post, you’re probably asking yourself…”Why am I reading this?” Seriously, congratulations and believe me when I tell you it’s only going to get worse. Okay, I’m going to avoid the segue thing because I really suck doing them properly, so break-break-break…new topic. Friends, as you all know, we here at CCB are fans of our neighbors to the north – no not frigging Canada, the state of Kansas! After all, it’s cheaper there you know. In fact, we have praised and/or ridiculed Kansas at least once or twice. Like the time that Garmin Corp (based in Kansas) came out with new software for their GPS devices (remember those?) and the state of Oklahoma was blacked out. We generally don’t pick on the Kansas state legislature, mostly because the legislature in Oklahoma could provide a lifetime of fodder for this stupid blog. Seriously, we really don’t pay much attention to the Kansas State Legislature, until, of course, they do something so bizarre that it goes national. Then we get all jayhawker on their ass. So last week, The Wichita Eagle (whose motto translated from the Latin is “Well, at least have basketball”), published a story about a new Kansas state law that makes it illegal for police to have sex with motorists they pull for traffic violations and/or detain in criminal investigations. Really? You need a state law for that? WTF is wrong with you people? Specifically, the new law prohibits sexual relations, “…during the course of a traffic stop, a custodial interrogation, an interview in connection with an investigation, or while the law enforcement officer has such person detained.” Wow, powerful stuff Kansas. Again, WTF? That’ll really put a crimp in the whole kinky roleplaying scenario of a guy dressed as a cop who pretends to “pulls over” a woman who doesn’t want her husband to know she’s getting another ticket and will do anything for a warning. Oh, sorry, that’s just me. Apparently, the legislature looked upon this as a loophole. Huh? Kansas has laws that sort of dance around the issue. It was specifically illegal in Kansas for people to have sex while they’re in jail. The loophole was that there was nothing to prevent you from having sex with a cop before you get to jail. Okay, one more time, WTF? Guess what? The police union up in Kansas is outraged, if not confused. They point out that most traffic stops are now recorded on body cams making it tough to get away with anything lascivious. According to state representative John Whitmer (R-Wichita), despite the body cams stuff can happen and it’s good to have a law in place when it does. Whatever the hell that means. That is all! Comments are closed.
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