Just when you think the world can't possibly get any weirder...The Joy of Ghost Sex. Welcome to Tuesday!

​A very good Tuesday to everyone! Hope you’re all doing well.

When it rains it pours here at The Compound. It’s been an incredibly busy couple of weeks around here and there’s no sign of things letting up any time soon.

Let’s see, here’s the rundown:

1) First and foremost, there’s the re-replication of the Cabinet Saloon out on the north lawn. That’s been kind of on autopilot since the start of construction with members of the POJOC handling everything. By the looks of things, we’re at about 80% done. It’s certainly been a blessing not to have to deal with any of that, though there are the all-night parties as the boys celebrate each day’s progress well into the night.

2) The Hairdressing Hydrologist Gigi has decided (who knows why) that Cousin Fred needs to become a self-help guru. Really? The guy can barely help himself let alone anyone else. Of course, Cousin Fred as a self-help guru is helping himself…I think. I’ve always encouraged people here at The Compound to reach for the stars and be whatever they’ve always wanted to be or at least try to be. Stupid me. As our loyal readers may recall, I commented last week that no one had seen Gigi for quite some time and I was beginning to think she was stuffed under a couch in Das Boot. Turns out she’s been working night and day on a philosophy of life for Cousin Fred to “gurate.” The plan is to push videos out on YouTube. Bet you can’t wait for that action, eh?

3) There’s the upcoming trip to the Burning Man Festival in Nevada. That starts this coming Sunday. Friend Lamont will arrive here from western Arkansas tomorrow and we’ll likely leave Friday. The Hairdressing Hydrologist Gigi is making noise that she likely won’t be able to go with us since she’s working on Cousin Fred’s self-help philosophy of life. That is a shame since we’ve already bought her ticket. I asked the Wife if she wanted to go with us, but she informed me she would sooner have major surgery sans anesthesia than spend two weeks in a cramped RV with me, Cousin Fred, and Friend Lamont. Besides, she’s supposedly headed to Tahiti for the period. At least having Gigi here at The Compound solves my compound mutt care problem. If anyone is interested in a free ticket and ride to Burning Man, let me know.

And, finally,

4) Cousin Fred is determined to turn The Compound into a medical marijuana farm. This despite nearly everyone who knows anything about the process telling him to wait at least two years until the dust settles and a firm market is established. Eh, not Cousin Fred, he’s pushing ahead full steam. The licensing process online begins this coming Saturday morning, so I’m not sure how he’ll pull it off being that we’ll be traveling to Black Rock.
So anyway, that’s a rundown of the news as it stands right now. I’m certain even more implausibly ridiculous non-events will pop up, but it keeps things interesting around here.

Cousin Fred has been receiving threatening emails from GoDaddy that his domain name and website, www.lovesick-leftovers.com, is about to expire and be pulled from the web. He told me that he plans to let it go – says there’s too much other stuff he’s focused on right now. Probably just as well, though it occurs to me that there are a lot of lonely people out there who could use a boost. Others seem to find their own path, if you will.

Take for instance, the British woman, Amethyst Realm, a “spiritual guidance counselor” (now there’s an occupation) who claims to have had 20 sexual affairs with (hopefully you’re sitting down) ghosts over the past 11 years.

No, seriously.

But, she believes she has finally found her one true love while on a trip to Australia. Yeah, he’s a ghost too. I’m sure her parents are so proud, but then again, they named their daughter Amethyst Realm so they probably are proud!
But wait, there’s more!

She wants to have a baby with Mr. Wonderful. In an interview with a publication (wonder if they used a ghost writer to do the interview), she said that while the idea seems a bit crazy (no sh*t, you think?) she believes it can happen.
She went on to say that her theory is that phantom pregnancies (aka, pseudocyesis, or false pregnancy) is nothing more than a ghost baby trapped inside a human body.

Hmm.

During a recent interview on ITV’s This Morning show in Britain, Amethyst revealed that she no longer has interest in a relationship with a human. One of the This Morning hosts commented during the interview that, “once you go ghost you never go back.”

‘Nuff said.

​That is all!
 

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