Happy Saturday everybody! Today’s blog is a good news, bad news kind of blog. The good news is Scott Pruitt resigned this week. Well, in this case, resigned is a euphemism for “…him got fired…” Seriously, I was in DC enough years to recognize when someone is facing the old, “You have until sundown to resign or we’ll fire your ass and leak to The Washington Post you were terminated for moral turpitude.” I’m sure The Trump was done with him but couldn’t have the media latch onto the fact that Pruitt would be the 45th Trumpster fired…particularly when you’re the 45th president. It just looks bad! I’m sure he had his chief of staff call up Pruitt and tell him, “You know, Scott, we’re close to firing you, but you could save yourself a lot of grief if you’ll just resign your position. That way you can probably drop right back into politics in that godforsaken state whence you slithered…what was it? Ummmm…starts with an O. Oklahoma, right?” Wait a second, what is that you’re saying John Kelly? Which brings us to the bad news. This morning I’m going through the overnight newsfeed hoping to find some new idiot, who in a bid to become famous the world over, ate 13 cans of pinto beans and then tried to light his own flatulence with a match in an effort to blast himself across the Grand Canyon. Evel Knievel would be so proud. Oh, it’s coming, you’ll see. But, I digress… So, in this morning’s newsfeed I see an article with the title, “What Will Scott Pruitt Do Now?” I responded with a hearty, who cares? I read the article…SCOTT PRUITT IS ON HIS WAY BACK TO OKLAHOMA! And, he's bringing The Trump's old mattress with him! Now, THAT alone makes the case for building a huge wall around the state to keep the likes of this fool out. At a minimum, let’s put Troopers at every road leading into the state to stop and turn his crookedness back into Kansas (it’s cheaper there, Scott!). It’s not like the Oklahoma Highway Patrol has anything to do than stopping hard working bloggers who were only going 6 miles per hour over the speed limit. AM I RIGHT? Some are suggesting that he could sit on the sidelines for a few years and then in 2022 make a run for governor (suddenly I feel like slashing my wrists and drinking battery acid). Please, can’t we elect someone who shows a glimmer of intelligence and sanity to the office of governor? No, no…it’s our penance on earth for stealing all the land from the tribes way back when. The heavy money says he’s the heir apparent of (shudder) Jim Inhofe who will be 85 when he comes around for reelection in 2020. Pruitt and Inhofe are close personal friends of course. Hmm…you know, maybe there’s something to that. Where else does a disgraced, inept, bungling, spendy bureaucrat turn when he seemingly has nothing left? The U.S. Senate, of course! Brilliant! After all, he was a multi-term Oklahoma Senator, so he already has experience in getting paid to do NOTHING. He’s perfect! Plus, if he’s a U.S. Senator, he’ll be living in D.C. again which keeps him out of our hair. I like this a lot! Actually, if he has to come back here, we shouldn’t let him in until he dishes on the G-D Oklahoma Evidence Fund that came into being during his tenure as Oklahoma’s Attorney General. We’ve discussed it in blog posts before, the multi-million-dollar slush fund that no one will discuss and only barely acknowledges. So, how about it, Scotty old pal? What’s the Evidence Fund used for? You can tell us. We won’t rat you out! Just another day in Oklahoma politics, I reckon. Not nearly as entertaining as a dude wearing nothing but his wife’s miniskirt while standing in the middle of the street shooting a gun and threatening to “blow people up.” But, it’s a close second. That is all! Comments are closed.
|
Archives
March 2019
Categories |